Best Deodorant For Chafing Balls
Any man who has never had chafing balls is either lying or might want to see a doctor. It’s one of the few banes of our existence, and it has plagued us throughout history. Some scholars suggest that wars have been ignited over the short temper that often accompanies this unique pain. Others will acknowledge that chafing balls are probably the leading hindrance to your professional and personal advancements. Thankfully, there is a cure. It’s called Crop Preserver.
The Magic of Powder
We talk about powder and gel a lot at Manscaped. It’s the heart and soul of our anti-chafing formula. But, rather than just tell you how and why it is wonderful, it’s time to discuss how it actually works. Strap in, boys, because today we are going to get pretty science-y.
Certain powder and gel formulations work as astringents. This causes skin and tissue to mildly constrict. The constriction is small and painless, but it’s an important part of the process. Constricted tissues reduce the presence of micro wrinkles. This makes the skin a little smoother and dramatically reduces friction. In other words, you won’t chafe so much.
The other advantage of astringency is that it helps control moisture buildup. With fewer small folds in the outer layer of skin, there is less room for moisture to hide. Generally speaking, this can help skin remain dry. In the case of your swamp region, it won’t lead to dryness, but it will prevent the excessive conditions scientifically known as swamp crotch. The moisture control helps the deodorant prevent strong odors from brewing. This is arguably more important than smelling nice in the first place.
So, now that you know how our formulation helps your balls, we want to brag a little about the design of Crop Preserver. Rather than just powder, we have incorporated a gel into our design. First off, this mitigates that negative side effects of using a powder. Powders can leave streaky residues, and, in the case of a little swamp crotch, they can turn pasty. Nobody needs that. By utilizing a gel, we eliminate these problems. Instead, the gel quickly dries and absorbs into the skin.
But Does It Work
Science is great, but it doesn’t always paint a relatable picture. Now that you know how the talcum works, we’re going to talk to you. Man to man. If you have never used a ball deodorant, then you completely underestimate how much you hate chafing and sticky balls. You grew up with it. Hot days are synonymous with your balls clinging to your inner thigh. Despite the discomfort, you’ve never known another life. You simply can’t imagine how much better you can feel when you get rid of that annoyance and discomfort.
The truth is that even on the best day you’re going to take dozens of those awkward, ball-freeing steps. On a worse day, you’ll probably look like a deranged hunchback with a hitch in your step. The culmination of the thousands of irritations that comes from ball friction and stickiness takes more of a toll than you think. When you try a little Crop Preserver and experience friction-free life for the first time, you’ll be beyond shocked. We can’t emphasize enough that it just plain feels great. Combined with some basic manscaping, you won’t even recognize yourself. You’ll be happier and more pleasant through the day. Focus will be a little easier. This sounds like hyperbole, but seriously, reducing the friction in your groin and keeping things nice and cool is the secret to success. You’ll enter a higher mental plane, and soon you’ll be able to move things with your mind! Ok. Maybe we took things a little far. The point is, there’s really no reason to avoid feeling good.
Not Done Yet
We just spent a lot of time talking about the wonders of powder and gel, but this deodorant isn't just a mash-up of the two in a bottle. It’s an engineered formula that is designed by men for men. When talking about skin care, pH balance and moisture barrier are concepts that get thrown around, but they aren’t always clear.
The moisture barrier is a real thing. Some call it the acid mantle. Basically, your skin maintains a thin layer of slightly acidic moisture to protect it from harm. It controls bacterial growth, maintains optimal hydration levels and grants your skin a little more toughness and durability. Needless to say, it’s important. Crop Preserver takes this into account. While the gel and the scents are designed for attractiveness and feeling good, the pH and hydration formula is built to protect your skin. As much as we love managing the pubes, even the most skilled hand and precise tools still subject the skin to more than a little irritation. Crop Preserver works vigorously to undo this damage.
Manscaping Like a Champion
As we like to inform, ball deodorant alone is not the pinnacle of manhood. It does work great, and it can mitigate the problems that arise from falling behind on your manscaping routine. But, it really is designed as part of a complete manscaping package, and without the rest, it can never live up to its full potential. Thankfully, “the rest” is not the cumbersome and overwhelming task you might fear. Here it is in four steps.
It all starts with trimming the bush. It only feels daunting because you’re a disgusting human being and you let it get so out of control in the first place. Or because you’re one of those Neanderthals who dives right in with a razor, bro. Just grab your Lawn Mower, place yourself over a Magic Mat, and get that stuff trimmed in a few short minutes. It’s easy. It’s painless. It’s essential to doing this thing right.
Once things are trimmed down to size, you’re free to grab the razor. Hopefully you have an idea of what you want to shave and not shave, but at worst a few experimental runs will be informative. For those looking for a little first time advice, shave the taint, shave outlier hairs to get good lines around the groin (like you would your beard), but only trim the balls. They look pretty weird and wrinkly when they’re completely bald.
Step three is a shower. Easy, right? Just don’t be lazy. On the days you don’t trim or shave, your normal routine is probably fine. But, when you do attack your privates with sharp objects, spare a few minutes to show them love. Not like that. Use you Crop Cleanser and properly exfoliate the area. For starters, this will be sure to remove the tiny clipped hairs that are itchy and annoying. It’ll also soften any cut hairs that are still attached. This is important to combating razor bumps. Trust us, you don’t want those on your balls. Most importantly, it cleans away damaged skin all of the problems you just caused, clearing the way for step four to work properly.
Step four is the easiest and the most important. Apply your deodorant. Also, give yourself a few spritzes of Crop Reviver. It has a few key elements that don’t work well in a gel, but are essential to a complete healing solution. Between the two, your nethers will never realize you brutalized them. Just give them a short span to dry before you get dressed. It boosts effectiveness.
If you commit to the full routine, you’ll feel better than you ever imagined. The days of pulled pubes, chafing balls and sticky, sweaty groins are all behind you. It’ll put a spring in your step that you won’t want to sacrifice. And, the real reason you’re here will be addressed. It’ll make you more attractive in the bedroom when things finally get far enough for you to drop your pants.
Manscaping is an art. And a science. And a pursuit. If you don’t want to have to reinvent the wheel for yourself, you need a reliable resource to help you stay properly equipped and informed. We’ve worked hard to make Manscaped.com that resource. We’ll help you stay ahead of the trends and outfitted with the latest technology.