Are you searching for the perfect facial hair? You want something that's pronounced, distinguished, and attractive, but not the same thing that every other guy is doing.
The answer is finally here. What you need is a beardstache. It’s the perfect solution to all of your problems. Masters of the beardstache are instantly accepted into the secret cabal that controls society from the shadows. Just kidding. Sort of. This is the facial hair of the truly powerful.
If you’re not too scared to investigate a little further, we have something that you really might love.
What is the beardstache all about?
Maybe you’re a little new to this party. That’s okay. Everyone is welcome.
But if you’re not quite sure what this is all about, allow us a moment to explain.
The beardstache is rapidly growing in popularity, and it’s essentially the facial hair style right now. The concept is pretty simple. It’s a style where a pronounced mustache accompanies a shorter, muted beard.
You can have a short beardstache that's mostly stubble with a relatively short mustache. Or you can have an epic mustache that serves as a centerpiece with a controlled beard framing it.
The beardstache is exciting because it leaves a lot of room for customization. You can really get creative with it, and as long as you follow a few general rules, it'll look pretty good. If any of that sounds promising, then the rest of this article is going to explain everything you need to know about the beardstache and how to grow and manage it.
To get to all of that, we should probably start at the beginning.
The totally real and not at all made-up history of the beardstache.
The beardstache has what might be the most fascinating history of any major facial hair style.
As you no doubt recall, the mullet was originally popularized by French fashion pioneer Henri Mollet back in the 70s. Over the next two decades, it became the go-to hairstyle for any guy (and honestly lots of women too) who needed to find the balance between business professionalism and unrestrained party.
Sadly, the mullet’s claim on society wouldn’t last forever, and it eventually became something of a faux pas. Unless you have an ironic one and live in Williamsburg, or something.
True believers in the glory of the mullet were distraught but not defeated, so they searched high and low for a spiritual successor to their favorite hairstyle. Eventually, the beardstache emerged. It has the same energy of combining pure fun with a mature sense of poise, and over the last two decades, it's slowly risen to prominence.
Today, the beardstache is a leading facial hair style, and wouldn’t you know it, the mullet is making a comeback too. That means you can have double the party, double the business, and double the awesomeness if you grow out a lavish beardstache and match it with your glorious mullet.
How do you grow a beardstache?
That’s enough history for one day. If you’re serious about exploring your beardstache, then we need to get down to the business end of this haircut, and that means explaining some of the essentials.
We’re going to skip the details of how to grow facial hair. You already have that down. Instead, let’s talk about what kinds of beardstaches suit what kinds of faces and what you can do about things from there.
Generally, the beardstache shines for anyone with a triangular, square, or oval face. It’s not so ideal if you have a circular or heart-shaped face. In other words, if your face is on the wider end of the spectrum, it’s going to be a lot harder to pull off an awesome beardstache. It’s not impossible, but these guidelines can help you think about what you really want from this style.
When it comes to actually growing your beardstache, we have a simple recommendation. Start small. Grow out a stubbly beard and mustache and keep your whole face trimmed at first. You’re going to want to trim the ‘stache one or two settings longer than the rest of the beard. (The zoom wheel on The Beard Hedger™ makes this very easy.) Once you do this, take a good look at the stubble and see if the general style works for you.
If it does, then you can think about a more pronounced mustache style and really get into the fun. (We’ll talk more about this in the next section.)
One thing to remember is that grooming is key. Even when you’re growing things longer, work on maintaining your beard lines and keeping your mustache trimmed evenly. This means you want a good set of scissors so you can manage stray hairs that outgrow the crowd.
How do you style a beardstache?
If and when you’re ready to pursue your beardstache with more gusto, then the following tips will help.
First, you need to pick your specific beardstache. You have a wealth of options, but the choice always starts with the mustache. Do you want a big, bushy walrus? Are you into the artful stylings of the Fu Manchu? Do you want something a little more original and hipster?
We can’t answer these questions for you, but your mustache will dictate the styling of the beard. As you’ve already learned, the mustache should be pronounced and obviously longer than the beard. That’s the entire essence of the beardstache.
If you’re having trouble settling on mustache style, there’s another way to approach this whole thing. Sure, aesthetics matter and stuff, but your beardstache is really more about matching your lifestyle.
If you’re a professional speed eater who specializes in hands-free pie eating contests, then you probably want a shorter, more controlled beardstache. If looking clean cut and professional is more your thing, then you probably want a classic mustache style that's a little over the top. If your job involves grabbing and holding people’s attention, then get flamboyant. Grow a long ‘stache with some twirls in it and match your beard. It’ll work.
Once you make these decisions, styling isn’t as hard as you might imagine. Most of it boils down to grooming, which we’ve already covered. The other thing you want to do is style it with a beard comb (or brush) and some beard oil. In particular, the oil gives your mustache a nice shine. If you’re keeping the beard short, it needs very little oil to stay healthy and attractive.
If you’re putting a little extra twirl in your mustache, beard balm will hold a bit better. It works as a one-to-one replacement for beard oil, so you’re good.
How do you take care of your beardstache?
The last thing you really need to learn is how to take care of the beardstache. We can distill this into three principles: Keep it clean, hydrate your skin, and groom appropriately.
Let’s gloss over grooming one more time. You’re using The Beard Hedger™ to control the length of your beard and your mustache. If your mustache is long enough, you’re using scissors to trim it regularly to keep things even, and if necessary, you’re using a razor to touch up your beard lines. That’s really it.
For cleanliness, showers are your friend. That’s probably not a surprise, but you do need to focus on your shower products. You want a good beard shampoo and a proper beard conditioner. These will help control the oils in your beard to keep them at a healthy level without things getting too dry or too slick. They’ll hydrate the beard, infuse it with important vitamins and minerals, and keep the hair healthy in general. They’ll also help your skin under the facial hair stay healthy and attractive.
Outside of the shower, you need to focus on hydration. Beard balm and oil are a big part of this. These products help you style the beard, sure, but they’re also acting in place of lotion for your covered face. You don’t really want to try to rub lotion past your spectacular mustache, so let the oil or balm take care of that for you.
If you stay on top of beard care, you’ll avoid dandruff, other flakiness, and the dreaded itch. You can keep your facial hair soft and approachable, and you won’t have red, splotchy, horrific skin underneath.
The ultimate facial hair is yours for the taking. You now know everything necessary to master the beardstache.
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