You’re ready for a change. There are some things in your life that you think need to be different, and while some people might not get it, you think that your facial hair is a good place to start.
We understand. You can use it as a jumpstart to reimagine how you think of yourself. You’re not the first guy to go down this path. You won’t be the last, and it might surprise you to know that it actually can work out well.
Of all the facial hairstyles out there, you’ve settled on the goatee. If that’s the case, then we want to help. Or if you’re just bored and want to read about goatees, we’re here for you too.
Let’s learn about goatees.
You probably think you’re ready for a goatee. You’ve decided that it’s the style for you and you’re just going to grow it. You’re underestimating this formidable lifestyle—because that’s what the goatee is. It’s not just a type of beard. It’s a new approach to life.
Before we tell you how to grow, style, and maintain a goatee, we’re going to make sure you understand the commitment before you. Monks, special forces personnel, and smoke jumpers all pale in comparison to the man of the goatee.
You see, it’s not really about the facial hair. Growing the hair is the easy part. No, the lifestyle is the real challenge. A man does not grow a goatee. Instead, he becomes one with the beard. Perhaps a little history can make that clear.
Looking back on the fabulous history of the goatee.
The goatee was invented in 2007 when Robert Downey Jr. wore the facial hair style in his portrayal of Iron Man. The movie was a shocking, smashing success and launched the largest cinematic franchise in history—and it all boils down to the success of that one goatee.
RDJ truly embraced the goatee for the role, perfectly walking the line between obnoxiously sarcastic, frustratingly charismatic, and annoyingly smart. He was masculinity perfected, and that perfection was clearly etched onto his face for all to see.
Needless to say, everyone started growing goatees in celebration of their new favorite movie character.
This was not to last.
It took only a few years before the crowd of followers came to realize the truth. Not everyone is up to the task. The goatee wears you just as much as you wear it. Even other superheroes couldn’t pull it off.
So the style faded. It didn’t disappear, but its popularity dropped as rapidly as it had grown before.
Today, only the chosen dare to even attempt this beard style, but those who can live up to it have the entire world in their palms.
Here’s how you can grow your own goatee.
Now that you know what you’re up against, we can tell you how to grow a goatee. We’ll explain the facial hair side of things, but unfortunately, we can’t teach you the most important part. Men of the goatee are not trained or taught. They simply are. If you're one of these men, you already know it. Our part in your journey is only to help you with your beard. The rest is up to you.
So let’s start with how you can grow a goatee. The first step is the easiest. Stop shaving.
Let everything grow a bit. This might seem counterintuitive since most of the goatee is closely and carefully groomed, but you need to see exactly how your beard grows in order to manage future grooming more appropriately.
Once your whole beard has grown to the length that you want to keep your goatee, you’re going to groom. Start with a trimmer (We’re fans of The Beard Hedger™.) and make the lines of your goatee. They should be round, but the edges of the goatee will depend on the shape of your face and your preferences. The best bet is to aim wide. You can always come back and trim it down more if you need to.
Once you outline your goatee, you’re going to trim the rest of your beard. You don’t necessarily need to shave; that depends again on your style choice, but the goatee should be obviously longer than any other facial hair.
With that done, you’re going to clean up the interior of your goatee. There are a lot of styles and options here, so pick one and go for it. Use your trimmer to clear out the parts that you want short.
Lastly, shave where you want to shave. The trimmer helped you shape the beard, so shaving should be easier to manage.
Don’t forget to style it.
Much of the styling of a goatee happens with your trimmer and razor, but there are some other style elements, especially if you opt for a longer beard.
If you keep things short enough, then you don’t need to worry too much about shaping your goatee with products and such. Instead, you want to apply a little beard oil once or twice a week to keep the hair looking shiny and appealing. Brush the goatee for a minute or two each day and you’ll be in good shape.
If your goatee is longer, then you do want to shape it with product. Beard oil still works great for a lot of guys, but if you need a little more styling power, apply some beard balm. (You don’t need both, as they provide the same hydration and nutrient infusions.) Comb and shape the beard according to its length and your style, and you’re good to go.
A quick product recommendation.
At this point, you should realize that you need a good trimmer, razor, beard oil, beard balm, and beard comb (brushes are fine). You might want some scissors too. You can find all of this and more in a simple, consolidated package that we call The Beard Hedger™ Pro Kit. If you want to make beard management easy, we’ve already done that for you, so at least check it out.
How do you take care of a goatee?
Okay. We’ve covered what it takes to be a man of the goatee. We’ve talked about growing and styling the beard. Now it’s time for some maintenance.
There are three things you need to keep any beard looking great, and goatees are no exception: cleanliness, skincare, and length management.
Let’s start with cleanliness.
Whether your goatee is short or setting length records, you need to keep it clean. Most of this happens in the shower. You don’t need to wash your beard every day (unless you’re using too much styling product), but you do need to wash it a couple of times a week. When you do, you want to use a proper beard shampoo and conditioner. These will clarify the beard, manage its natural oils so they don’t get out of control, moisturize the hair follicles to keep them healthy, and supply your facial hair with much-needed nutrients that make it look and feel spectacular.
It’s worth noting that the best beard conditioners aren’t used in the shower. They're leave-in conditioners that you apply to the beard in the morning and leave in all day.
Even when you keep your beard clean, you want to do a little skincare. The shampoo and conditioner are a starting point, but hydration goes a long way too. You can’t exactly use lotion on the bearded parts of your face, so sub in beard oil (or balm if that’s better for your style). This will directly moisturize the skin under the beard, which helps prevent itchiness and dandruff.
Lastly, you have to keep the beard properly trimmed. Again, your beard length is up to you, but goatees don’t exactly grow infinitely. Eventually, they get long enough to lose their shape, which defeats the whole purpose.
To maintain your goatee, you want a good pair of scissors. Once a week or so, you’re going to comb your beard against the grain so that all of the hairs stand out. Trim away anything that's too long. That will keep the beard clean.
Additionally, you have to regularly trim/shave the non-goatee parts of your beard so that the shape stays clean.
Lastly, if the whole goatee needs a trim, you can find the right length setting on your trimmer to take care of that. If your goatee is too long for any such setting, then go back to the scissor method. Comb everything out so that you can see the comparative lengths, but don’t stop with trimming outliers. Use the comb as a straight edge to help you scissor-trim the entire beard.
Start conservatively so you don’t cut too much too fast. If you take your time, you can trim the goatee back down to size, and you’ll be in good shape.
That actually covers it. You now have the knowledge and access to the tools you need for a perfect goatee. If this is your lifestyle, we encourage you to seize it.
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