What Is a Chode and How to Keep It Groomed Properly
Chode… hearing the word probably brings up unpleasant and embarrassing jokes made at the high school lunch table. The class bully would point at the kid he didn’t like and start taunting him by calling him a chode, and probably end up throwing little wadded balls of paper at the back of the unfortunate kid’s head.
Whether you were the bully or you were the kid getting bullied, the reality is that chodes are relatively common. Despite the myth that society (and Pornhub) try to sell you, the average penis length is not 8-inches. In fact, it’s a lot closer to 5.2-inches when fully erect. The average male girth (circumference around the shaft) is only 4.8-inches.
What Exactly Is A Chode?
There are some people who throw around the word chode without even knowing what it means. With so many different slang words that describe human sexual anatomy, it can be very easy to get confused on some of the terms. It’s often mistaken for the taint, or perineum.
However, the scientific definition of a chode is:
“A penis which has a larger circumference (girth) than overall length.”
If we take a look back at the average penis size, the average male is only .4-inches away from having a penis thats bigger around than it is long. You may have a chode and not even realize it. Maybe you’re lucky and it’s on the larger end of the spectrum, or maybe you’re a lot closer to average than you’d like.
Whatever the case is, today we’re going to be talking a little bit about chode maintenance. Here at Manscaped, we believe that your penis is one of the most sensitive, delicate, and important parts of your body, and should be cared for as such.
Caring for & Grooming Your Chode
Sit down and think about everything that you do as part of your daily routine. You might do a quick workout, stretch, shower, trim your beard, iron your shirt, and match it to your favorite shoes and watch.
On average, men put a decent amount of effort into keeping themselves looking clean, sharp, and well-appointed. However, the topic of genital grooming and care is one that almost never gets brought up for discussion.
Perhaps it’s the fear of awkward eye contact or it’s fear of judgement, but men usually don’t talk about shaving their balls. If they do, it’s often part of a crude joke that results in some muffled laughter.
Keeping your balls well-groomed is one of the sexiest things that you can do according to women. Not only does it show that you care about your own cleanliness, but it shows that you’re proud of what you have and that somebody else’s opinion doesn’t define the size of your balls.
With this in mind, let’s dive into some general care.
Before we get into advanced grooming techniques, here are a few things that you can do to keep your chode looking and feeling healthy.
No, we’re not talking about choking the chicken. Penis stretches are an actual thing and should be done on a weekly, if not daily, basis. Men stretch their penises for different reasons. Some do it to make their penis larger (which it can if you practice long enough), but others just like to have a nicely-proportioned penis that functions well during sex.
Whatever your reason may be, stretching has a lot of benefits for your chode. For one, it can make your chode not a chode over time. For two, it increases your sexual stamina and ejaculatory control. For three, it just feels good. After the intense workout of a night full of sexual activity, there’s nothing quite like a good stretch.
One of the best things that you can do to better the appearance and presentation of your chode is to give your penis a massage. There are few things that are as relaxing as an oriental penis massage, and you can either give yourself one or get your partner to help you.
You want to start with a warm towel. Wrap this around your shaft and balls and lightly compress it. Continue this for about a minute. It will get your blood flowing and warm-up the muscles.
After this, take your favorite moisturizing lotion or oil and massage it into your shaft and pubic muscles. If your penis becomes more than 50% erect, take a short break or you may risk injuring yourself. Massages should always be performed with a flaccid penis.
No woman wants to pull your penis out of your pants and feel like they’re looking at a cactus in the desert. One of the simplest things that you can do to keep your penis looking healthy and read to perform is to moisturize it daily. You can use your favorite oil or MANSCAPED Crop Reviver to give your cock the look of a sexual oasis.
Chode Grooming Tips
So now that you know the preliminary information, let’s take a minute to discuss chode grooming tips. Shaving your cock and balls can be intimidating the first time you do it. Few people naturally feel comfortable putting razor-sharp blades anywhere near their privates, but with the right tools and techniques, you have nothing to fear.
Tip #1: Get Yourself Some Good Tools
The best place to start is with Manscaped’s ultimate kit, The Perfect Package 3.0. It comes with everything that you need to get started. You get a pair of ergonomic electric shears, Crop Preserver to keep your balls dry and moisturized, Crop Reviver toner, a set of disposable shaving mats, and a pair of boxers to dress up your boys.
Tip #2: Learn How To Shave (Carefully)
The first couple of times that you do it you might get a small knick or cut, but don’t let this dissuade you. Practice makes perfect. Keep the electric shears away from the surface of your skin, and always use plenty of shaving cream with a safety razor.
Tip #3: Always Clean And Moisturize Afterwards
Shaving can be rough on your skin’s pores. If you don’t properly clean and moisturize them afterward, then you risk getting razor burn. Penile razor burn looks way to close to an STD for comfort, so make sure that you don’t forget to spritz some Crop Reviver spray after a shave. This will calm your pores.
Keeping your chode groomed doesn’t have to be a struggle and it doesn’t have to be complicated. Ignore the social stigma that you’re used to getting about the topic, and make the decision to start treating your penis the way that it deserves to be treated.
You should be spending as much time caring for and grooming your penis as you spend on your face. MANSCAPED makes it easy with their full lineup of high-quality shaving products and tools that are designed specifically for your delicate genital skin. The Perfect Package 3.0 is a great place to start and includes everything that you need to start looking and feeling your best.