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THE MAN CAVE

06/25/2019

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How to Take a Good Dick Pic

Fellas, we need to have a serious talk. Technology has changed all of our lives, and some things that should be better than ever really aren’t. Clearly, we’re talking about your dick pics. A lot of you are floundering out there. You’re sending unflattering pictures to people who don’t want them. It’s a huge mess.

Today, we’re going to come together as men and remedy this situation. It’s time to raise the bar on dick pics, and we can do that fairly easily. With these 10 points, you can transform your dick pics into true works of art. It’ll be better for your sex life, and it will make the world a better place.

1. Get Permission

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Sometimes the extreme sensitivity of modern society can be annoying and un-fun. That doesn’t really matter in this case. Every woman ever asked says that unsolicited dick pics are the worst part about modern dating. A whole lot of gay guys agree with that assessment. The very most important part of sending a great dick pic is to send one that is wanted. Until and unless you know this, you’re taking a huge risk. The last thing you want is for your sloppy dick pic to be plastered over the internet with some caption pointing out how small it is. And, for those of you who think you’re too big for this problem, you underestimate the power of an annoyed female with even modest Photoshop skills.

how to take a good dick pic

2. Start With Lighting

Ok. Now that we’ve established you’re sending the pic to someone who will appreciate it, we can discuss technique. There’s an entire industry dedicated to making photographs look better, and it’s huge. Maybe, just maybe, you should consider learning a few things from professional photography.

One of the ultimate keys to good pictures is lighting. Everybody talks about angles, but they're wrong. Start with lighting. What’s tricky is that there is no universally perfect lighting. The right light source depends on what you’re trying to capture with the photo. Even though all of these pictures will feature the same subject (your member), they won’t all serve the same purpose. Now, you can get a lot of mileage out of playing with filters. You can judge for yourself what lighting is best for each picture.

But, if you really want to push your dick pic game to its peak, you’re going to have to study a little. This basic guide will get you started on lighting techniques. Where you go from there is up to you.

3. Consider More Than the Dick

Sometimes, you just pull your drawers out a little, aim the phone, and snap the picture. There’s a time and place for that, but great dick pics require considerably more effort. In general, there’s a lot more to show than an aerial view of your penis. Are you manscaped? Maybe that should be present in the photo.

Do you work out? If you have abs, pecs or anything else to show off, they can be included in your dick pic. You really want to steer into the motif of “draw me like one of your French girls.” Poses and a little art can go a long way, and a lot of women find the penis and balls to be the least attractive part of the male body. Full nudes are more powerful than most of your realize. Remember that the next time you’re thinking about snapping a dick pic.

how to take a good dick pic

4. Make it Dynamic

If you only remember two things from this list of tips, this needs to be one of them. Dick pics are supposed to be sexy. That means you have to think about more than just including a sex organ. Consider from your own perspective. What are the hottest photos you’ve ever seen? They probably look like a still frame from an action.

Better yet, do you prefer still photos or video porn? There’s a reason for this, and you can apply it to your dick pics. 

When asked, a majority of women say that the idea of a man stroking himself while thinking about her is incredibly sexy. Your dick pics can play into this. You can take a short video, or you can send one of those photos in action. Even if you go for the classic still, the idea that you’re losing control in your sext exchange is way hotter than a random picture of a dick out in space. Dynamic context is your friend.

5. Be Honest

Since we’re talking about touching yourself in the photo, this is a great chance to broach another subject. Your own hands are the best tool ever for providing scale. Some of you scoff. Others are worried. What you need to realize is that you can’t lie about the size of your penis during sex. No one in the history of humanity has ever been fooled in this regard.

The key to a good dick pic is to be honest about what you have. Scaling to your hand sends the message (side note: don’t be that guy who pulls out a ruler). It shows that you aren’t ashamed of your penis, and they shouldn’t be ashamed to enjoy it.

Here’s another way to look at it. No matter the size or shape, you love your penis. Shouldn’t you be with someone who loves it as much as you do? We can guarantee that this standard will lead you to better sex.

how to take a good dick pic

6. Be a Little Coy

Again, dick pics are supposed to be sexy. Usually, they play into some variation of sexting. You aren’t able to tease each other in person, so you do it via technology. Why, then, would you completely ignore this concept when you’re snapping dick pics? It’s crazy.

Here are a few ways you can incorporate teasing into your photography. Take a full-mirror picture of you in nothing but your underwear, pitching a massive tent. That sends the message that the other person has you fully aroused, but the little mystery serves as a tease. 

Another amazing picture would be to suggest that you’re stroking yourself without actually showing it. If that’s not your speed, how about the picture where your penis is pushing its way through the fly? It suggests that your boner is so insatiable that it’s hulking out.

Hopefully, you get the idea.

7. Practice Good Timing

Picture this. You’re in the middle of a crucial business meeting. You’re showing some slides or whatever, and you forgot to silence incoming messages. In the middle of the presentation, there’s a little notification with a nude picture in the caption. That’s bad business, and we all know it.

Know your partner’s schedule at least a little. If you don’t, assume they work on a regular basis. Dick pics should be respectful of the fact that we all have to earn a living. Let’s not use them to ruin someone’s career. 

That said, good timing can also be super sexy. Let’s imagine another work scenario. You’re at the desk, and it’s one of those days that’s just dragging by. You get a message and check  your phone. What’s there? A thirsty text with a naughty picture. That’s super hot.

Inappropriate timing can be the sexiest thing in the world, but it has to be calculated. If you’re not sure what you’re getting the other person into, play it safe. But, if you know it’s a chance to make them crazy, have fun. 

how to take a good dick pic

8. Take a Risk

Before we explain this advice, we have to lead with a disclaimer. Nobody is advocating for public exposure. That’s not something you need on your criminal record, and going around the neighborhood to explain that you’re a sex offender is definitely not sexy.

We’re all on the same page? Good, because risky dick pics can be the sexiest thing ever.

There’s something about doing the taboo that makes everyone hot. Taking dick pics where you know you’re not supposed to can definitely trigger that response. The trick is to be smart about it. Instead of taking a dick pic at the cash register, sneak off to the dressing room for a little privacy. You’re in the mood at the pool? At least make sure no one else is around.

In case you're missing the point, the key to a risky dick pic is the background. Your crazy setting has to be apparent in the photo or there's no point.

Risky dick pics can be your ultimate weapon, but you need to avoid accidentally traumatizing a child in the process. You gotta use both your heads to succeed with this one.

9. Have Some Fun

There’s been some serious advice in here, but we’re all still trying to have fun. Isn’t the best sex at least a little fun? Why shouldn’t that translate to the best dick pics?

There’s really no limit to how you can have fun with this. Obviously, it helps to know the sense of humor of the person receiving the pic, but if you’re feeling wild, take a chance. Tinder is nothing if not an endless stream of second chances. You can put a knitted kitten hat on the tip or wrap the whole thing in a bow. Do some weird poses. Use inappropriate captions. This is the one area where the sky is the limit, but if you don’t ever have fun, there’s no point in sending dick pics at all.

10. Manscape

Remember when we said there are two bits of advice that are the most important? This is number one. If you forget everything else you just read, remember that manscaping, more than anything else, is the key to a great dick pic.

Yes, we’re biased. We’re also right. It is fundamentally impossible to have a good-looking dick pic with a wild bush. There’s nothing aesthetically pleasing about that on any level. Now, if you’re in the right kind of relationship, a before manscaping pic can be properly silly, but if that isn’t rewarded with an after shot, then you’re just selling your chances of getting laid down the river.

There’s no singular rule to how best to groom your shrubs, but here’s some free advice. It should look ordered and deliberate. Also, remember the lawn analogy. The lawn should be mowed, but nobody is impressed by a dirt lot. Going completely bald downstairs is not a safe bet, unless you and your partner are into that sort of thing. We don't judge.

Lastly, great manscaping only comes with effort and persistence. Manscaped.com has everything you need for both. We carefully engineered an entire set of tools that is crafted to give you amazing control over your grooming and health. We also have entire archives of manscaping advice to help you improve your game without all of the trial and error. Take a look, have a little fun, and let your next dick pic be truly breathtaking.

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