Manscaped’s Guide To Getting Laid For Single Guys
Let’s just come out and say it. We’re doing all of this to get laid. It’s the oldest and most powerful motivation for men, and that’s not going to change any time soon. Today, we’re going to put away pretext and help you guys up your game. Some of you might feel like experts and think you have nothing left to learn. Others might feel hopeless. This guide is for all of you, so we’re going to take a few minutes to help you get into a mindset that is certain to help you get laid more often and have better sex when you do.
It’s a Numbers Game
This is one of those truths that everyone misunderstands. There are two sides the the “it’s a numbers game” coin. The first is to help those of you out there who experience this thing known as shyness. Being shy isn’t a crime. You’re fine. But, that shyness can be a nest of bad and unproductive thoughts. The point of thinking about this as a numbers game is to help soften the fear of rejection. We’re talking about getting laid. Finding “the one” is a whole different mentality and can of worms. Getting laid is about finding a comfort zone that potential sexual partners will find attractive.
For a lot of guys, fixating is a problem. You worry about a whole bunch of things that really don’t matter. Or, you’ll decide that the one complete stranger you see over there is the one you need to take home. That’s ridiculous. Instead of fixating on one person, try to meet multiple people. Look for someone who’s fun to be around and let that translate into a good night. If you approach someone and it doesn’t go anywhere, it doesn’t matter. There are plenty of fish in the sea.
By that same token, you don’t really have to worry about compatibility. No one on the planet is universally attractive (or unattractive for that matter). If you play the game long enough, you will eventually strike out. Conversely, if you’re in a dry spell, perseverance will prevail. That said, we aren’t suggesting you go blitz every bar in town and try to talk up every women (or man) you can find. We’re just saying to relax. You’ll find someone who genuinely likes you if you can get out of your own head.
On the other side of the coin we have the guys who are out to win “the game.” This is just as ridiculous and destructive. Look, we’re not saying you can’t hook up and have fun. We’re giving you a guide to getting laid! But, when you worry too much about results, you get in your own way. You don’t have to try so hard. Calm down and have a good night. Hookups will flow if you can do that. And, this brings us to the next tip.
Focus on Fun
We get it. You want the great sex at the end of the night. We all do. But, once again, we’re talking about the mentality that will help you succeed. There’s a lot of fun that can be had between meeting someone and getting their clothes off. Take a moment to enjoy it. This is why everyone tells you to be yourself. If you’re into Dungeons and Dragons, then you should be trying to find women with common interests. It’ll be more fun and translate to better sex.
That’s an extreme example, but the point is simple. If you focus only on trying to get into the bedroom, you’ll come off as creepy and desperate. If you’re trying to have fun in general, you’ll have a positive attitude that translates into attractiveness. To some of you, this sounds like work, but that’s because you still don’t get it. Women are into all kinds of things. You can legitimately find some who enjoy the same pastimes as you. Why not have a great outing before you get down to the hanky panky?
Ok. If you run over someone’s cat, you can apologize. You’re also never getting laid by said person. The point here is to be yourself and not be ashamed. The truth is that everyone is at least a little weird, and getting laid is way better when you find someone who is into your brand of weird. It leads to more fun before the sex (see above) and a way better time in the sack. So many guys try to fit a certain mold, but that kind of advice is too generalized for any real interactions.
Here’s an example. Most women despise back hair. We always talk about how to get rid of it to improve your odds in dating. But, this is the numbers game portion of our advice. There are a few women out there who are into the burliest, hairiest men they can find. If you truly, genuinely love your back hair, you’ll have a better time finding those strange unicorns. Obviously, this is a ridiculous example, because nobody loves back hair. But, the point is real. Most of the time, you’re quirkiness only comes across as the bad kind of weird when you don’t own it. That said, save your weird bedroom kinks for later. Best case scenario, you’ll run out of tricks in the sack way too soon. Worst case, you’re receiving a restraining order.
Look the Part
We’re focusing on the mental game today, but looking good is part of your mental preparation. The thing is, Tinder and the like are still the easiest ways to meet people. You’re getting judged instantly. You need a good profile (which can be guided by the above tips), but you also need a good profile pic. You don’t need to look like a male model. You just need to put your best foot forward. Take time on your picture. Get help taking it! You want a photo that is representative of who you really are, but it also shows your better angles and lighting.
Going back to the numbers game, you’re going get skipped by plenty of females no matter what your picture looks like. But, if you put that effort into your appearance, the ones who do take a chance are more likely to find someone they want to take home. And, if you don’t at least curb a little of your sloppiness, you’re going to get skipped more than you should.
You’re thinking that this is part two of looking good. That’s not wrong, but it’s not the most important part of this section. We’re talking about mental game today. Working out is one of your two most important tools in this regard. Only a small part of it ties back to looking your best. Far more important is how regular exercise will help you build a positive mental attitude and feeling of well-being. You don’t have to be a dedicated gym rat, but if you’re getting good, regular exercise, you’ll have a better energy that always translates to attractiveness. It’s just science.
This is the other important tool to feeling great. Again, manscaping will help you look your best, but today we’re more interested in how it will help you feel your best. Regular manscaping does a few things to your mind that help you get laid. The most obvious is that it makes your penis look bigger. Everybody mentions it for a reason. When your own manhood looks bigger in your eyes, it comes with a confidence boost. It’s inescapable.
Manscaping also makes your daily life more comfortable. Pubes are hot, sticky and smelly. And, they tug on your sensitive bits a lot. Manscaping eliminates all of that from your life. There’s a cumulative frustration effect that suddenly disappears. It’s a mood booster, and feeling good can create a positive feedback loop that makes you substantially more attractive.
And, of course, manscaping makes you more sexually appealing. Some of it is apparent at first glance. A manicured beard garners positive attention. A lot of manscaping is also about eliminating turn-offs. Ugly fingernails, tufts of fur sticking through your shirt and the general odor that comes from being a dude can all help you remain decidedly unlucky. Manscaping is a route to removing these obstacles. Above all, when it’s time to get down to business, a manscaped lawn is essential. It tells your partner that you put care and effort into your junk and your sex life. It also makes BJs a more appealing prospect. On every front, manscaping is essential.
Since we pride ourselves on being manscaping experts, we’re going to give you the 30-second tutorial to get you started. Start by grabbing your Lawn Mower and Magic Mat. Trim everything that looks bushy. From there, grab your Plow and smooth out the sections that need it. You don’t want a neck beard above the shirt, and you probably shouldn’t have one below the belt. From there, hop in the shower and scrub with Crop Cleanser. That will ensure you’ve eliminated the bacteria that were hiding in your bush and get you smelling fresh. After the shower, apply some Crop Preserver. The deodorant will keep you clean and delightful throughout the day. But, before you get dressed, also add a spritz of Crop Reviver. It’s the formula that prevents this process from causing skin damage.
That’s your total routine, and it’s enough to get you on the path to getting laid. If you want to know more about manscaping or explore other ways to improve your presentation and your love life, you can find it all at Manscaped.com.